Murdoch Monthly - Romancing the Zen(dikar)
08 Mar 2010 | Fox Murdoch
A dizzy blur is your vision, your hair is ruffled something awful and there’s the scent of… of romance in the air. You’ve just woken up and remembered, it’s Valentine’s day!
Get out the wine and break out the romance readers, it’s a love and flowers themed article this time! And to celebrate I wanted to make some pink lovey-dovey decks! Trouble is thought that Magic only has so many colours, and apparently “romantic pink” isn’t one of them. Shall we settle for white and red? Shan’t we? We shall.
Now seeing Valentine’s day is a time honoured holiday I’m going to use the time honoured format of Extended, and her many lovely blocks. At least up to Ravnica, where the red and white theme is second to none thanks to the cherishable Boros guild! Standard players will just have to wait for ZZW draft later, waiting like cute teddy bears. So with Mirrodin, Kamigawa and Ravnica: City of Guilds I’m going to go through each block and make a dedicated red white deck that tries, in some manner of flavour, to really give it to your beloved opponent.
A note on ‘it’. It is whatever you want it to be, though in Magic games that’s most often “20 damage” and preferably “to the face”, so just imagine your creature’s fists holding bunches of roses and heart shaped chocolate boxes, why not, and replace “damage dealt” with “love delivered”, awwww. That’s what ‘it’ is, and no you may not have a vomit bag. In order:
Mirrodin block (Mirror-darlin, Heartsteel, Dear Fawn?)
My favourite set, where better to start? If we want quick beaters we’d better get some cheap creatures who hold a strong fist—uh I mean hold a mean bunch of flowers. To that end I elect Auriok Glaivemaster. What’s a Glaive? Some species of romantic long stemmed flower, I’m sure. 2 power for 1 mana when equipped, plus whatever the equipment gives? Sounds like someone’s in love with equipment! Perfect. And Bonesplitter – perfectly costed, ever-efficient love-point pumping Bonesplitter. Why, with your help Auriok Glaivemaster can give your opponent four love-points on turn 2! Isn’t that romantic? cue vomit bags And Drooling Ogre, a whopping massive 3 love points for only 2 mana? Amazing. He clearly loves artifacts and curling up against the leg of anyone playing artifacts, but seeing you’re the only one in Mirror-darlin’ that’s clearly you.
Barbed Love-ning deals an amazing 6 points of love for the alright price of 5 mana. Oh, I know Seering Blaze does that these days for a mere 2 but we’re not talking about land-love right now. Barbed Love-ning makes a cute matching gift for opponent and their creature alike, dealing 3 love points a piece!
Say your opponent doesn’t want the love and starts putting up walls? Arcbound Hugger (aka Stinger) can fly that love straight to your opponent’s face. His 1 point of love not quick enough? Vulshok Morningstar—uh should I say Morninghug—can help speed things up.
Ancient Den makes sure there’s always a nice quiet location to exchange lovenotes with your opponent and the Great Furnace keeps a warm night from ever turning cold. Careful with the glasses of wine or you’ll be experiencing a Shrapnel Blast, bursting the love at about 5 points a whack! Be careful Mirrodin-ites!
Mirrodin’s love banquet (Mirrodin block, minimum bling required)
4 Ancient Den
4 Great Furnace
6 Mountains
6 Plains
—-20 lands
4 Auriok Glaivemaster
4 Leonin Denguard
4 Drooling Ogre
4 Arcbound Stinger
4 Oxidda Golem (as George Michael sang, “fast lovin’”)
—-20 creatures
4 Shrapnel Blast
4 Barbed Lightning
4 Leonin Bola (to keep your loved one snuggling)
4 Bonesplitter
4 Vulshok Morningstar
—-20 other
Kamigawa block (Handsome-ions, Sweet’-Sayers and Love-iours of Kamigawa)
Isamura, Konda’s Pooch is the quickest thing outta this set, even faster than the lusty-hasting love-giving Ronin Houndmasters. Spread the love around by collecting tears of purest happiness on Umezawa’s Jitte then giving back some lovin’ (+2 life) to yourself, awww.
Glacial Ray keeps the love points flying left, right and center as you prevent your opponent from giving too much love to your creatures and making sure you get it instead with Candles’ Glow. Kasuri-Gama spreads the love over one side of the board like so much strawberry jam over a sandwich you share with your sweety on a picnic.
Fumiko keeps the love from being held back and allows your creatures to deliver their love personally to your opponent, dog saliva all over their face! Ogre Recluse may be shy (Um, did they cast a spell? Ahehe, I can’t go out today. Got a zit y’know?) but when he tells you he loves you, he makes sure you get the message.
Overblaze doubles the love and Through the Breach allows for all kinds of startling surprises! Yosei and Ryusei both join the party to smatter and smother the board into pure inaction! When you’re in this love-elevated state of ecstasy why would you want to do anything else? Hidetsugu also makes an appearance to prove that, yes readers, he ISN’T heartless. Here’s the deal: ramp up to 9 mana, cast Through the Breach to put ol’ Heartless onto the battlefield, then Overblaze him and tap. Tada! Enough love for everyone!!
Kamigawa Romance Extravaganza! (Kamigawa block, medium-high bling required)
12 Mountains
12 Plains
—-24 lands
4 Isamaru, Hound of Konda
3 Kumano, Master Yamabushi (he’s like teacher, giving everyone a little something)
2 Fumiko, the Lowblood
2 Yosei, the Morning Star
2 Ryusei, the Falling Star
2 Masako the Humourless (surprise hugs for everyone!)
2 Heartless Hidetsugu
—-16 creatures
4 Desperate Ritual (single on Valentine’s day? This ritual is for you!)
4 Glacial Ray
4 Candles’ Glow
4 Umezawa’s Jitte
2 Kasuri-Gama
1 Tatsumasa, the Dragon’s Fang (anyone for a love bite?)
1 Overblaze
—-20 others
Ravnica block (Lovnica, Lovepact and Love-session)
Ah, the most on-theme block in this article! So on the ball, too. Of Lovnica’s ten guilds the Boros are the most romantic, being so confused (lawful chaotic!?) by their overpowering adoration for the city of Lovnica!
Boros Guildmage is giving presents of haste and first strike to everyone, while tiny Boros Recruits are the first to stop everyone and say “Hey man, we love you.” Skyknight Legionnaire keeps the air filled with your message of love, while Lightning Helix (the plural of helix is helices, don’tcha know?) makes a point of being particularly heart-shaped. Hearts are just helices with curved nibs.
Razia shows up to make the love truly felt and also help spread it around, and to keep her arms open for any love being returned from the opposing side. Her Judgement sits around and waits for the right moment to make those perfect three words the only permanents. (note: Magic doesn’t have cards called “I” “Love” or “You”. Yet…)
Sacred Foundry keeps you honest but you’ll need some loving to make up for its heart-sapping hunger, so maybe some Brightflame? Sunhome Enforcer also helps with the make-up lovin’, and Sunhome, Fortress of the Legion keeps you huggin’ with BOTH arms.
Excruciator becomes “Great Big Puppydog” as his ability now reads “Love that would be given from Excruciator can’t be rejected.” Hunted Dragon makes a sweet present of some 2/2s for your opponent to return the 6 love points to your face. Living Inferno, you touch everyone you meet. Master Warcraft becomes Master Lovecraft, oooh yeah cue Barry White.
Boros’ bangin’ heartbeat bashin’s (Ravnica block, medium bling required)
4 Sacred Foundry
2 Boros Garrison
2 Sunhome, Fortress of the Legion
7 Mountains
7 Plains
—-22 lands
4 Boros Recruit
4 Skyknight Legionnaire
4 Boros Guildmage
3 Boros Swiftblade
2 Sunhome Enforcer
1 Razia, Boros Archangel
1 Excruciator
1 Hunted Dragon
—-20 creatures
4 Lightning Helix
4 Faith’s Fetters (more love for you)
4 Boros Signet
2 Sunforger (Valentine’s packages, FedEx a Helix today!)
2 Brightflame
1 Master Warcraft
—-18 other
Enough with the romance already!
Aww, had enough? Alright well we’ll skip to our EDH section then. This time around I thought I’d interview someone I realised I haven’t introduced yet – ME!
Who or what is a Fox Murdoch? This strange ninja disguised humanoid was first seen at the Bertrayers of Kamigawa prerelease complete with ninja mask and sword. He’s had a small stint at being a level 1 judge (seriously man, I can prescribe any Layer I want) and has written about a years worth of articles for the old mtgparadise.com, which these forums used to be connected with. He picked up Magic in 1999 with Urza’s shindig block, then again with Mirrodin and he hasn’t looked back since. We were fortunate enough to get him to answer our EDH questionnaire:
Fox Murdoch (FM): Hi there thanks for joining us. Just some details first. Real name?
XXXX: It’s Fox Murdoch. Nah I’m kidding, it’s Jacob Moriarty (JM).
FM: Where do you play?
JM: Good Games in the city, or if I’m out west Mega Games, Penrith. Occasionally Battlecraft Games in Eastwood.
FM: Favourite General?
JM: Isn’t it weird talking to your alter ego?
FM: Stop confusing the readers and answer the question.
JM: I like crazy Generals to match EDHs flavour, so Braid’s, Conjurer Adept.
FM: Colours?
JM: I always try to play Black but end up in red and blue as well. Green and white I’m also quite friendly with.
FM: Casual or competitive player?
JM: I was casual for ages, but I’m stepping up this year. I’m going to win PT Amsterdam.
FM: When did you get into Magic?
JM: It was 1999 when a mate at school had a card game. I liked fantasy and figured myself for a nerd, so watching a few games couldn’t hurt. 11 years later and here I am, still playing.
FM: How did you hear about EDH?
JM: I first heard about it on the Magicthegathering.com website, and my playgroup had heard about it when I brought it up. I loved the idea of a mighty legend sending your army into battle, plus it also allows for really whacky stuff.
FM: What’s your favourite thing about EDH?
JM: There’s so many cards that just collect dust because they’re no good in duels or for tournament games. EDH is their place to shine (and hurt) as good as any other card.
FM: Best play you ever made?
JM: Piloting a friends Niv Mizzet, the Firemind deck I had a suspended Wheel of Fate counting down to 1. I controlled a Thought Reflection when Wheel of Fate went off, copying it with Twincast as well. Add Mindmoil to the mix (you are drawing those cards you cycle through) and we had me quite close to decking myself, as well as Niv-Mizzet pinging two players out of the game!
FM: Best play you ever saw?
JM: I had the thrill of playing in an 8 player EDH zombie game (I’ll describe Zombie in a moment) when it was down to the table versus one player. Our commander figured out a very complex plan, involving Ninja of the Deep Hours, my pinger and someone else’s Artifact. He attacked, needed to ninjutsu the Ninja but realised his only land tapped for two mana, so he’d manaburn for one no matter what. He was at one life. Good game?
FM: Worst General?
JM: So far, the degenerate ones are my least favourite. They allow aggressive creativeness, which isn’t as fun or interesting (to see or play against) as crazy creativeness, ala Braids Conjurer or Norin the Wary or … Ben-Ben Akki Hermit. Not to name name’s but Uril, the Piss-taker and Sentriplets are plenty unfair.
FM: Best General?
JM: Phage the Untouchable. Nothing lets you leave a game quicker, especially if you really want out of what has become a boring game.
FM: Couldn’t you just concede?
JM: No, this way you’ve got a more respectable out. You died by your own General, you were clearly an arse and deserved it.
FM: If you could change one of the rules of EDH which would it be?
JM: I would change the rules concerning coloured-mana creation. I understand that my own General can’t make colours beyond their own colours, but if I steal someone’s Golgari Signet it should still tap for GB mana. That way, I could also steal their Plague Boiler and use it at my own leisure, instead of staring at my newly-stolen still-useless-because-it’ll-blow-up-anyway Artifact.
FM: Alright, before you go can you explain EDH Zombie?
JM: Elder Dragon Highlander ZOMBIE is a larger multiplayer format designed to keep games from going on too long. Once a player dies, they restart the game at 40 life and are now a zombie to whoever killed them. Their commander tells them what to do and essentially has them under a permanent Mindslaver, but now if their commander wins the zombie also wins.
FM: What if a Zombie kills another player?
JM: It follows a chain of command. A zombie’s zombie is still controlled by the commander at the top of the chain. This variant allows dead players to keep participating once their deck has flopped, or whatever.
FM: Thanks for your time.
Here we have the mono blue Braids, Conjurer Adept EDH deck. Surprisingly effective, it’s won several 4-5 player chaos games thanks to appearing so damn useless. Talk about playing possum!
Braid’s Blue Bobbin’
General – Braid’s Conjurer Adept
34 Islands
Minamo, School at Water’s Edge
Seat of the Synod
Hall of the Bandit Lord
Tolaria West
Academy Ruins
Magosi, the Waterveil
—-
40 Lands
Disruptive Pitmage
Spawnbroker
Clone
Voidmage Apprentice
Thought Courier
Sage of Epityr
Bonded Fetch
Deep-Sea Kraken
Somnophore
Memnarch
Maitresse Transmutatrice (Master Transmuter)
Skill Borrower
Meloku the Clouded Mirror
Guile
Shapeshifter
Soratami Savant
Vedalken AEthermage
Sphinx Ambassador
Jushi Apprentice
Vedalken Engineer
Magus of the Jar
Soratami Seer
Floodgate
Teferi, Mage of Zhalfir
Vesuvan Shapeshifter
Body Double
—-
26 Creatures
Spin into Myth
Quicken
Spell Burst
Hinder
Twincast
Pact of Negation
Commandeer
Fold into AEther
Hibernation
Time Stop
—-
10 Instants
Reshape
Inundate
Traumatize
Temporal Cascade
Acquire
Flow of Ideas
Trade Secrets
Foresee
Denying Wind
—-
9 Sorceries
Chamber of Manipulation
Threads of Disloyalty
Copy Enchantment
—-
3 Enchantments
Diviner’s Wand
Sword of Fire and Ice
Sensei’s Divining Top
Triskelion
Gate to the AEther
AEther Vial
Thought Dissector
Mesmeric Orb
Crystal Shard
Sculpting Steel
Orb of Dreams
Mirari
—-
12 Artifacts
Part tribal Wizards, part milling machine, part “blue best’s bodies”. Orb of Dreams and Mesmeric Orb is a laugh. End of turn you want to have Teferi in play so you can cast Braids, get a “free” upkeep, then bounce her back off the battlefield so no one else gets her freebies. The deck is also part “pigeons” seeing the more players, the more action you’ll get out of the “free stuff for everyone” mechanics of the deck, ala Temporal Cascade, Braids herself and Gate to the AEther.
So how is that Bazaar Trader competition going?
You know who loves combos? Bazaar Trader and Worldwake. With the new Plant tokens running around he can literally give flowers (you know, like roses) to his opponent – what a sweet little goblin!
If you didn’t catch my last article, WHERE WERE YOU!? I mean, ahem, I started a competition that asked my fine assortment of readers to submit their best combos with Bazaar Trader. There’s prize boosters for the best five submissions and I’ve had some great entries thus far.
Entries can be submitted until April’s article goes up, so get your entries in. You can PM me in the forums via darkur_fox or you can email me directly at starfox400@hotmail.com. You can use any card known to man, including Silver bordered Unglued/Unhinged fun.
First place is three Zendikar/Worldwake boosters so get your brains into gear! Second place gets two boosters and third to fifth receive one apiece.
Stop Zending me to sleep…
Oh boy, drafting! I like my chilli hot, my Guitar Hero on Expert with hyper speed activated and my women crazy, so it’s obvious I love the quickest format in Magic! This past weekend I played in a Zen/Zen/Wwk draft and it was ballistic fun. It also bore a little lesson for me to learn.
The draft was at Megagames, which has been around a while now and has it’s established player base. The metagame is obviously different from other stores. For starters, the average player age is closer to the early teens, and for seconds it doesn’t feel half so cutthroat as other locations. And kids are easier to beat, right? Wrong.
The above assumption has lead to my embarrassment before, as I recall a youngun beatin’ down my sorry arse at PTQ Prague (Dan Gow’s run, not Foggin’s where I came 16th) with a Rakdos deck sporting the legendary Demon himself – that WON. The bruises have healed now, thank you, but I went in to this ZZW draft not assuming easy wins. I’d decided before the draft started that I’d hit up White and see what goodies she could offer, because she had Steppe Lynx and lands for annoying turn 2 power plays, and from that I could dip into Allies or red for Plated Geopede tagteam action.
The best way to explain how this worked out for me is to show you my decklist.
Fox Murdoch’s white weenie adventure
18 Plains
—-
18 Lands
3 Kor Hookmaster
2 Kazandu Blademaster
2 Fledgling Griffin
Devout Lightcaster
Steppe Lynx
Makindi Shieldmate
Kor Outfitter
Hada Freeblade
Perimeter Captain
Cliff Threader
Marsh Threader
Apex Hawks
Ruin Ghost
—-
17 Creatures
Iona’s Judgment
Journey to Nowhere
Pitfall Trap
Adventuring Gear
Narrow Escape
—-
5 other spells
I had Iona herself in my sideboard, along with Brave the Elements and Bold Defense for extra combat tricks. Upon reflection there were too many two-drops, I’m sure another Apex Hawk or other high-costed fatty would’ve been very easily accommodated. And Steppe Lynx is all the little kitty is made out to be. It’s so weird to play a game where it’s correct to intentionally miss your third land drop so you can pump your freshly cast kitty-Lynx next turn.
The above monstrosity was a miracle actually. I haven’t drafted such an efficient deck before. Not only is it monowhite, it also curves out at 3! I knew it was good and would be able to keep 2 land hands easy, especially if on the draw. Was this the result of conscious effort, extreme study beforehand or sheer luck?
I’m sad to say it was sheer luck, and this is where the draft has a lesson for me. This deck was thanks to one of the other players, Sarah. Teenage girls seem to be a rarity amongst Magic players, but this metagame featured a hellfire of a teenager who has a monopoly on the colour White when drafting. So much so that the other players avoid white entirely because they know she’ll fight them for it tooth and nail. The fact that I decided to also draft White was a piece of luck, made even more so by the fact that we were in different draft pods. The lesson? LTFM! (That is, learn the friendly metagame)
How did it perform?
Round 1 versus Matt (b/u Vamps n Tricks)
Game 1 against Matt I get a Hada Freeblade who didn’t see any fellow Allies, so he steps aside as Matt’s Vampire Lacerator comes in for 2, then again with an Adventuring Gear equipped. The Lacerator’s upkeep keeps nipping away at Matt’s life total and eventually Fledging Griffin and Kor Hookmaster show up (over two turns as he had Whiplash Trap) to steal the game back.
Sideboarding I considered Iona and immediately discard the idea as I didn’t reach even 5 land that game. Traded out one Fledgling Griffin for a Bold Defense considering the lack of removal action from Matt’s deck but never ended up using it.
Game 2 Kazandu Blademaster shows up early and hits the offensive. Matt plays a Halimar Depths and I clarify “Does it just rearranges three, or does it scry 3?” “Just rearrange,” he smiles. I keep the beats raining down when Kor Hookmaster shows up and tangles up Matt’s Enclave Elite. I do some fancy footwork to keep Steppe Lynx in attack formation (Narrow Escape on a Plains? Rofl!) and it’s curtains for Matt.
1-0
Round 2 versus Matt (a different one) playing b/u
Didn’t I just do this? According to my notes I win another two games in a row taking the match with Steppe Lynx attacks and Kor Hookmasters equipped with Adventuring Gears. Seeing the notes on this round are sparse I’ll go over a maindeck decision I was having trouble with. I do remember having Brink of Disaster cast on my Kazandu Blademaster though, that was clearly Play of the Day.
Devout Lightcaster is a heavily white card, wanting WWW for a meagre 2/2 body. Against black, she pains to the point of an aneurysm but with everyone else she’s a rather shameful Gray Ogre in a set that’s blistering fast. I considered this later with Rony and he pointed out the field of decks we were dealing with. If I took ALL the white, and he was in green and red himself, we could assume that blue and black was spread liberally around the rest of the players in our pod. In she went and was a delight against everyone except for my third round opponent…
Round 3 versus Rony (green red Allys stompy)
That’s right, round 3 against the one player I KNEW didn’t have a single black card maindeck or sideboard. We’d tested before the matches started and I lost to him 0-3, as his Allies featured the horrifying Greypelt Hunter (trample WINS games) and double Murasa Pyromancer (yes, two). No matter how quick my guys came out of the gate he would staunch the flow with his first fat-drop, then if my Hookmaster stream dried up I quickly lost as he played an Ally and his trampler grew to 5/5 proportions, and he Pyromance’d two of my white weenies into white heaven. Having Bestial Menace (or Circus Explosion) just made things worse. Making sure I don’t tilt myself, we shuffle up.
Game 1 I keep and drop an early Devout Lightcaster, Rony smirking, and a Hada Freeblade who stick some holes in Rony, but his Greypelt comes down and I don’t have any answers, or draw any. He plays Oran-Rief Survivalist and his side grows bigger than mine, I fail to draw any removal and despite getting him down to 7 with a Cliff Threader (that guy just LOVES Mountains) Rony wins.
1-0
Game 2 Rony stalls on a few lands, and makes very few plays. I drop Kazandu Blademaster, then Kor Hookmaster. Turn 5 they’re joined by a kicked Apex Hawk and it’s all but curtains as Rony can’t draw his outs or cast his creatures. I win the game on 20 life.
1-1
Sideboarding for the last game I focus on getting as many guys onto the battlefield as I can, hoping to clog up the ground and get through with Apex Hawk and Cliff Threader duos, pronto. This plan goes awry however as Rony proceeds to play all his green creatures, never dropping a Mountain. His Gnarlid Pack comes out as a 3/3, Greypelt Hunter shows up again, along with Oran-Rief Revivalist and I’m left needing to draw a piece of removal yet again. Cliff Threader does an honorable job of beating in with Adventuring Gear, but seeing Iona’s Judgment had already done it’s thing I was banking on Pitfall Trap to save my bacon, which I realise I hadn’t seen once in 6 odd games. Bestial Menace from Rony is the 3/3 to Rony’s efficient one-two punch and he takes the match.
2-1
I come second in my pod and get some plump picks, Beastmaster Ascension, Emeria, the Sky Ruin, funilly enough a Bazaar Trader (hey, have I told you about the competition I have going?) and a foil Corrupted Zendikon.
Drafting Zen/Zen/Wwk is as much fun as Zen/Zen/Zen wasn’t. I mentioned previously that I thought Zendikar resembled Ikea, in that you pay upfront for something and then still have to assemble it. That referred in particular to Allies (that’s not a 1/1, it’s a “bear”? Crap!) and the quest Enchantments, seeing the final product was hard to see and therefore made the cards (and draft choices) hard to judge. Knowing there’s a Worldwake booster coming helped immensely as there’s many more cards that do a fantastic job of being ‘just so’, as in Grotag Thrasher is a 3/3 with “soft removal” and that’s it. Calcite Snapper is a 1/4 wall (or swings for 4) and that’s it. Even Zendikar’s Pillarfield Ox was a welcome sight, seeing he’s a chubby 2/4 wall for four, which you can happily skip over all the same.
That it’s from me for this month! Next time around I should have an Extended PTQ experience to chew your ear off about, and of course more EDH!
Thanks for reading, Fox Murdoch.
For discussion.